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Fake friends? Blame Facebook

I remember a time when the strength of a friendship was determined by more than just the number of photos you were tagged in or how long your wall-to-wall conversations were. I remember when a friendship couldn’t be reduced to a single screenshot on your computer.

You may have noticed something new on Facebook — an application that lets you see a summary of your friendship with another person. The page includes wall-to-wall conversations, mutual friends, likes and dislikes, events you’ve both attended, and a photo selected by Facebook to represent the friendship.

But a friendship encompasses more than just photos and likes or dislikes. Relationships take time to develop — there are complexities involved, and every friendship has different nuances that make them unique. To reduce these intricacies to a screenshot is insulting.

As a society we have become far too comfortable with taking the information we see at face value — we don’t take the time to dig deeper and look at the bigger picture. This new application is no exception. While we might not like our own relationships to be reduced, we’re inclined to drift to these friendship pages to see the status of other relationships.

What used to be private is now open to the world, and the intimate relationships we once cherished have become a public spectacle.

While it may seem silly to think about now, unconsciously Facebook is dictating our friendships and the way we interact with one another. It used to be that you had to work to maintain a friendship, but now a simple wall post can be used as an excuse for not making a short phone call to see how they are.

If a friendship page has a lengthy wall-to-wall conversation, or you’ve attended a lot of events, this seems to justify avoiding any actual conversation or need for future social interaction.  Facebook used to be about helping maintaining friendships — now it’s just a crutch. It even notifies you of friends it thinks you should check up on or send a message to.

It’s important to remember that in the end, relationships — whether romantic or platonic  — need to be maintained outside of Facebook to truly thrive. Interactions on Facebook do not always reflect two people’s relationship in real life, and a friendship can certainly not be reflected in a few messages, pictures or a frivolous Facebook application.

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