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Toronto: Where failure is still profitable

It’s not exactly a key to Fort Knox, but buying the majority share of Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment is just about as close to a right to print money as you’re going to find on the open market.

That’s where the sports mega-conglomerate finds itself today, with the Ontario Teachers’ Pension Plan indicating a desire to sell off their 66 per cent share in the most lucrative sports franchise north of the 49th parallel.

The price tag is a bit steep at $1.6 billion or so, which is reportedly about a quarter billion dollars more than what the property is actually worth. But you couldn’t possibly find a better way to spend your inconceivable amounts of money.

And naturally the bidders are lining up. Rogers, Bell, Telus and even minority shareholder Larry Tanenbaum — who currently controls just a 20.6 per cent stake of the colossal conglomerate — are all said to be in on the auction.

Of course no one really believes that Tanenbaum will be able to find the $1.6 billion under his mattress and would need a team of investors to help him make the purchase.

Which means that for Toronto sports fans, the misery, woe and soul-crushing despair shall continue, as their teams remain lacking the one thing they truly need — an individual majority owner.

For most Toronto sports fans, the exit of the OTPP is a massive sigh of relief.

They are, after all, the nameless, faceless corporation that sat idly by watching their pockets expand at exponential rates while the on-ice, on-court and on-pitch products dwindled, never showing so much as an ounce of bother.

As long as the cash continued to pile up and the platinum seats remained reserved, everyone at OTPP was more than willing to idly watch the god-awful product they offered most nights.

The games sold out, people continued to die on the waiting list for Leafs season tickets and no matter how much they raised ticket, concession and merchandising prices, the stock continued to fly off the shelves.

It’s all well and good if you’re a cynic and have accepted the inevitable complete corporatization of professional sports. But believe it or not there is still the vast majority of credulous out there, all bright-eyed and bushy tailed, who want their sports teams to actually, you know, win.

But for them, chances are any kind of sustained success for a sports franchise in Toronto won’t come without smarter, more passionate ownership.

The Maple Leafs went with an over-the-hill lineup for years before just recently realizing that maybe this young and fast trend isn’t going to fade away.

The Raptors refused to trade Chris Bosh for draft picks and young assets when it was entirely evident he had no interest in remaining in Toronto, much like the Utah Jazz did with Deron Williams who had half  Bosh’s profile but still netted them an impressive return.

It would be easier to swallow a 30-games-below-.500 season if there were more than two examples of bankable young talent on the team.

And of course there’s Toronto FC who can’t seem to wrap their heads around the fact that no one wants to shave years off their careers with the inevitable knee surgeries required after playing on BMO Field’s scorched-earth-like turf, which makes the Rogers Centre look like the gardens of Eden.

Not once, while these atrocities of reason and assaults against forward thinking were taking place did an owner step in and say: ‘you know, maybe this isn’t working.’

Because without any semblance of public pressure or accountability, why would you? And do you really think Bell or Rogers will operate any differently?

It’s clear that what MLSE needs is a sole, individual owner whose passion and tenacity forces success. Think Mark Cuban with the Dallas Mavericks or Terry Pegula with the Buffalo Sabres.

Those owners create success because they are fans first and astonishingly rich people second. Not to mention innovative thinkers third.

They want their teams to win more than anything under the sun and don’t tolerate ignorance. They are unflinchingly rigid on the ultimate goal — numbers in the win column before the bottom line.

But in Toronto, where unlike anywhere else in the world losing equals revenue, the corporate control is practically assured to continue.

There’s just too much money to be made.

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