It is the purest relationship I will ever have. There are no pretences, no expectations, no pressures.
There are no roles to play. Not the role of the ideal daughter, granddaughter or the eldest sibling, the stellar student, the dutiful significant other.
I can be just me.
I can divulge my secrets, my weaknesses, my anxiety-induced thoughts, knowing I won’t be taken advantage of, knowing they won’t be used against me.
I can be vulnerable; I can wear my heart on my sleeve because it has taught me there is a strength in showing vulnerability.
It is unconditional.
It is the only relationship I will ever have that doesn’t require maintenance; it's natural and effortless.
I don’t mean that one doesn’t need to make time for their friends.
What I mean is that we can go weeks without even talking to each other and pick right back up where we left off. Which other relationship would allow this?
We have many different types of friends in our lives and they all fulfill a human need. But you always have that one friend.
And this is the bond that you cherish no matter what because you know that it’s rare.
I was 12 when I found my first true “best friend.” I use this term with a mixture of sarcasm and reserve because at this point in life it’s almost an understatement to me, especially because of its over use these days.
I can’t think of one thing that this person doesn’t know about me. I learned the true meaning of friendship from this person. This wasn’t a juvenile middle school type deal that was bound to outgrow its time, it quickly became one of the most cherished relationships I would ever have. This person is one of the main reasons for who I am today and continues to influence me to this day, nearly 10 years later.
Our relationship has changed over the years. We don’t talk nearly as much as we used to, but we don’t need to. Life happens. There have been some major changes in our lives in the past decade but we know that when we need each other, the other is always there. We’ve gone through too much for it to be any other way.
This is a friendship I know will stand the test of time, stand the test of life.
But it is not infinite. Friendship is tied by an invisible elastic band. You can stretch it pretty far, but stretch it too far and it will snap.
If only there was some way – besides calling or writing or seeing face to face – to express how often you think of them, that indeed, their friendship means the world to you.
Words don’t suffice. Do actions? Or is the thought enough?
Despite having many friends, I don’t let people in easily. Someone once used to tease me that I must have suffered some crushing polygamist betrayal by a husband in my past life. But it’s an all or nothing kind of deal for me, so I’m skeptical.
I’ve learned a few very important lessons in my four years here.
There are those you click with instantly, then those whose guts you hate within the first few moments of meeting them. But being open minded has led me to friendships with the unlikeliest of people.
You will have relationships where you will have given it your all, and still it won’t be enough. But you know what? That’s okay. You will get over it; life is too short for it to be any other way.
Being the most authentic, majestic unicorn version of yourself that you can be will only benefit you. It’s in your candid moments you will recognize the people that can revel in the majestic weirdness that is you and these are the people you grab and hold onto.